September? Where did summer go?

My parent's backyard over the 4th of July Holiday.

Summer flew by this year!  Or was it just that I was too preoccupied to notice?
Avery has kept every day interesting.  From squeals to giggles, this little girl has enough energy to make every day feel like a party. 

I jokingly mentioned to my husband that I needed a full time job to afford all the clothes I want to buy. And he said something very refreshing and eye opening. He made a comment saying that I do have a full time job, I just don't get paid money for working.  But I get paid with smiles, laughs,& priceless moments that are a gift just for me from Avery. Moments that can never be reproduced or shared, moments that shape my soul.
I have never felt more like myself than I do now being a mother. I have come into a whole new freedom that I could never have any other way.

We weren't planning to get pregnant and have a baby while going to college.  That's not the ideal financial situation, no money coming in and a LOT of money going out.  However, God had better plans.  I honestly don't think I would have survived living the same way for yet another two years, just waiting until we could start a family.  And now that we have Avery I almost wish we would have started a family sooner. The joy and freedom and life that I've discovered is like nothing else and I sure wouldn't mind having started sooner.  But God's timing IS perfect!  And it is fascinating to me how God has provided every single one of our needs (and MANY wants) seamlessly along the journey.  I have no fear of financial dismay or material insufficiency.  Not because I am stupid, unaware of reality, or careless, but because I have faith.  I trust God and have confidence without any doubts that He loves us and knows how to take care of us. He has blessed us in so many ways all of these years.  And I feel so honored that He has blessed us with a beautiful and happy baby girl.  She is perfect in every way and it brings a smile to the very core of my being when I see those little big eyes look at my face and light up. 

And there she is, her little grunts in the baby monitor.  That little voice that fills my heart with happiness anytime I hear it. Yes, I want her to sleep, but her voice is an astounding comfort that my little world is ok and normal.  I was created to be her mother, and hopefully a mother to maybe a brother or sister of hers. 

Thanks for reading to this point. I adore how every person is so different.  And how different people make up unique families.  And the unique solutions to each family's issues.  When did we start thinking that different is wrong and not just, well, different?  

The more I read about parents and babies the more I realize you need to find your parenting style and family style and commit to it. There's no uniform solution for any kind of issue with any person in any area of your life.  I wonder where the idea started that there should be one thing that always should work for everyone. 

Hmmm... that certainly doesn't make sense to me.  I really didn't intent on sharing jumbled thoughts tonight. 
But thanks for reading and you are welcome to continue the conversation.  Yes, I have conversations with myself in my head.  Who doesn't?  

Seven Months

I have been pregnant for 28 weeks. 

I am starting to realize that now is crunch time, and I need to get busy with the baby stuff.

In my head, I've thought that I have time to think about this or that later. 

Now is later. 

These next few months are going to fly by so fast and I won't know what happened to them.

I am exited, but I wish I could pause everything and get it all ready, and then hit play again.

God has been teaching me a lot about peace and trust this year. 

I am very thankful for that, because I am going to need to better understand those concepts soon!

As far as health and the pregnancy, everything is where it should be.

I am on track with growth, weight gain, heart beat, etc. etc.

Thank you, Jesus!

This is a very exiting time! I find myself enjoying the last little bits of married and no kids, but I can't help but look forward to taking care of this little person all day long and pouring all that I am into raising her and loving her. 

I can't wait to meet you, Baby C. But don't come too early. I'm not ready yet. 

Time to kick it into high-gear.

=)

Home Sweet Home

There is no place like home for the Holidays.

Sunshine on snow covered trees.

Christmas lights on the deck that you can see when you turn onto Washington rd.

Burning wood in the fireplace.

Baby C kicks every hour of each day.

The smell of burning wood.

Horses and a Red Barn across the road.

Lilly Lou laying in the sun like a cat.

The sound of the fans on the hearth.

Puppy Chow.

Pete, Peri, Jeremy, Leslie, Kenney, Candace, Isabella, Wyatt, Owen, Evan, Tyler and Angi.

All together for Christmas.

Playing hymns on the old piano.

White rolling fields. 

I am so thankful and blessed. I am truly happy at home. 

There is no place like home for the Holidays.

Peace

The Great Life

"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you:...Let not your heart be troubled." John 14:27

Whenever a thing becomes difficult in personal experience, we are in danger of blaming God, but it is we who are in the wrong, not God; there is some perversity somewhere that we will not let go.  Immediately we do, everything becomes as clear as daylight.  As long as we try to serve two ends, ourselves and God, there is perplexity.  The attitude must be one of compete reliance on God.  When once we get there, there is nothing easier than living the saintly life; difficulty comes in when we want to usurp the authority of the Holy Spirit for our own ends.

Whenever you obey God, His seal is always that of peace, the witness of an unfathomable peace, which is not natural, but the peace of Jesus.  Whenever peace does not come, tarry till it does or find out the reason why it does not.  If you are acting on an impulse, or from a sense of heroic, the peace of Jesus will not witness; there is no simplicity or confidence in God, because the spirit of simplicity is born of the Holy Ghost, not of your decisions.  Every decision brings a reaction of simplicity.

My questions come whenever I cease to obey.  When I have obeyed God, the problems never come between me and God, they come as probes to keep the mind going on with amazement at the revelation of God.  Any problem that comes between God and myself springs out of disobedience; any problem, and there are many, that is alongside me while I obey God, increases my ecstatic delight, because I know that my Father knows, and I am going to watch and see how He unravels this thing.

From the book My Utmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers.

Little Baby C, what will you be?

Surprise, surprise! It's a girl!

Daniel and I really honestly thought it was a little boy growing inside there, but, God had a better idea.

I am so thankful and honored to be blessed with a daughter. 

This is such a wonderful thing!

I am so happy.

Thank you, Jesus for all the blessings you give us!

Let the preparations begin...

16 Weeks

Week 16: Baby C is now the size of an Avacado

New Milestones:

His scalp pattern has started to develop! (Even though he hasn't started growing hair yet)

He is starting to grow toenails!

His heart is pumping about 25 quarts of blood a day!

 

Coming Soon:

In the next few weeks, he will double his weight!

I will soon be able to feel the baby move!

 

        I am still very thankful that I feel normal. I didn't realize just how much I took it for granted before. Feeling normal is actually quite pleasant. My appetite is almost normal. The only strange thing is that I don't have much of a sweet tooth right now. Which is very abnormal. Don't get me wrong, I still have a sweet tooth, but it's just not as big as normal. I suppose that is a very good thing anyways.

       I still don't really look pregnant. People are asking me if I am showing. I can tell that I am, but apparently it's not very obvious. I still look like I am just not sucking in my gut. I am sure that I will be sick of being huge by month 8 anyways, so I guess no rush little one.

 

Akward moment:

 ( have had a few of these actually.) My personal space bubble has been broken a few times when some very kind hearted and good intentioned women rubbed my belly. Remember that I am not really showing. So it's really like they are just rubbing my belly, not a baby bump. I am SO uncomfortable with this. I hope I think of a kind way of asking people not to.

Because I really don't like it.

 

Missing Anything? Lunch meat.

For some reason, any sort of food involving lunch meat sounds really great. For example, pickles wrapped in ham with cream cheese! Good ol' fashion sandwiches, lunch meat on salads and in eggs. I usually don't want lunch meat that much, but lately I have wanted these particular things.

 

Currently craving: Creamy Mac-n-Cheese with Tuna.

For those of you that have been around me quite a bit, you know that this isn't a strange pregnancy craving, I usually eat my Mac-n-cheese with Tuna.

 

Latest news:

At my last Dr.'s appointment everything was in good shape. I finally discovered that I am blood type A+. The baby's heartbeat was loud, strong and consistant again. So wonderful to hear that little sound. It blows my mind just trying to imagine a little person with the little heartbeat. Well, really, it's quite the heart beat, much faster than mine, and that's good. There is one little thing that will change my labor-plans just a smidge, but it's nothing too serious and everybody is going to be fine.

 

Silly Staci Highlight:

Even though I am not showing, my clothes are starting to get uncomfortable and so I have been on the hunt for maternity clothes. I dis-like wearing pants in general, so I decided that the only maternity pants that I HAVE to buy would be a pair of work pants and then some leggings. I decided that maxi dresses and skirts are going to be my normal wear during the big months. So, the other day, I had some extra time in town and I was in Walmart. I peaked around in the clothing section to find some maxi dresses on clearance from the summer. I ended up taking three with me for just, wait for it, $11! But that's not all, I stopped over at Goodwill next....... Long story short, there's only one place with maternity clothes within a two hour driving distance. Target in Marquette. Just so happens that Target sells their "left-overs" to Goodwill. And just so happens that there was a pair of work pants, tee, tank, and maxi dress never-worn-before-tag-still-on-it in my size!!! Thank you, Jesus! I also found some other fantastic things like an Old Navy knit cape that will serve as a blanket in disguise that is socially acceptable attire for public. YAY. I even found some other things that day at Salvation Army. I think that I am almost done shopping for my maternity wear thanks to Jesus and that one day of thrifting. It sure was fun!

 

Well, that's all! Thanks for sticking in there during this super long post.

 

*Love Life*

 

 

 

 

 

 

15 weeks

Week 15: Little Baby C is the size of an apple. 

Week 15 milestones:

He/She can move all of his/her limbs now and sense light. Also, Baby C is forming taste buds and has developed enough to tell what the gender is. 

We will be finding out sometime before Thanksgiving and sharing the wonderful news. After keeping the secret through some nasty morning sickness I am very sick of secrets. 'haha no pun intended' 

I am also planning a fun way to share the news. 

Pintrest has so many great ideas on it, and I am exited to pick one and plan it out. 

At this point, my little baby can squint, frown, grimace, and possibly suck his/her thumb! Baby C has been moving quite a bit, even though I can't feel the movements yet. I got to watch him/her in action during an ultrasound, all sorts of movement. Waving, stretching out his/her legs, opening and closing his/her mouth and flipping and rotating. It was amazing to see it all! I think my favorite part was when the little legs were stretched out all the way as if to get comfy and then go back to sleep. 

Baby C has fingerprints! A personal set of them that no one else on earth has! And all this before he/she is even the size of an apple. Another incredible thing is, if Baby C is a girl, she has 2 million eggs in her ovaries already! Of course, so much more has happened in the development of Baby C, but those are some of my favorites. 

I am going to be honest. I think it's going to be a boy. So from now on I will save myself a dash and just say him and he. But know this, we have not discovered the gender yet. So I may be right or wrong. I will be ultimately happy if I am right or wrong though. 

I grew up with 4 older brothers, and big brothers are awesome. I really like the idea of a big brother. And I hear boys are easier as the first child also. So I really like the idea of a boy. 

BUT......

If Baby C is a girl... I will have so much fun! I have been dreaming of a daughter since before I met my husband. I would be so ecstatic and I would have so much fun making all sorts of super girly things for my baby and I would have so much fun dressing her and being girly. I know it sounds like I am talking about a doll, but I do realize that those are not the only amazing things about girls. Having a best friend around to teach and help grow is priceless and beyond words.

These are just a few things in the grand endless scale of things. 

There are so many things to think about being pregnant. And then dealing with a changing body on top of that. It is a fantastic experience. Even though most of it so far has been in bed and bent over the toilet, it's already one of the best things that has happened to me! 

Thank you, Jesus for this blessing. 

Until next time.

Welcome Baby Cerminaro

Daniel and I are exited to announce that we are going to have a baby in April of 2013! 

I haven't posted since I discovered I was pregnant, because #1, I have been consumed with thoughts about Baby C, and #2, I wasn't ready to share the news yet and I was afraid it would make it's way into this blog on accident.

But, I am free now, the secret is out. 

And prepare yourself for some Baby Fever Postings. I hope you don't mind. 

But it has kind of taken over my life. 

God is good and he has blessed us with a bundle of joy. 

I am so exited and so ready to be a mommy. 

(I think so anyways, about the ready to be a mommy part). 

Talk to you soon.

Fabulous Friday

Today is just wonderful.

Strawberries, Fudge, HGTV.

Laundry, Organizing, Cleaning.

Practicing, Playing, Projects.

Hillsong, Fingernail Polish, Purging. 

Sunshine, Lilly, & Ironing.

Thank you, Jesus for this lovely day.

The Story of a Bus Ride

 My husband and I are blessed with one vehicle. It gets us to work and school and back and to where we want to go. We are very thankful for this said car.
Having one car does make it a little difficult however when one wants to travel, oh say, 10 hours to go to a wedding. Means of transportation are expensive and difficult to come by when you live in the UP.  For example, the closest place to rent a car that we are aware of is about 2 hours away. Not very convenient. Flying is too expensive. Train is not an option neither is renting a car.  I haven't mastered the method of Beaming, but Scotty, we're getting there. And when I do figure that out I will let you know.
Well then, looks like I will be taking the bus.
Not all that bad. Nice bus, comfy seats, bathroom in the back, and not too crowded.
And even through the first transfer things were looking good. Got my choice of seat for each ride and it was a red eye trip so things were quite and dark. Get over the Big Mac and the sun decides to join me in my travels. I find things to keep my hands busy as the bus gets a little noisier. Next stop, I can just sit back and relax because I don't have to transfer. I am getting pretty comfy and pleased with the way things are going. Smooth, easy, relatively pleasant minus the lack of sleep.
I am starting to see familiar City names like Traverse City, Petosky, Grayling. We even got a 20 minute lunch break in Grayling at a quaint little local deli. Nice.
Or so I thought.
As the bus loads up to head out from our lunch break, the bus driver notices a problem. One person too many. I thought it was a bit strange he didn't take my ticket at the last stop, but I didn't see a problem as my destination was not mentioned for the last transfer. Just as he was about to put the bus in gear a breeze of panic flew by my gut. I walked up as his hand was on the shifter and I asked, "Am I the extra person?"
...........................
He looked at my ticket and let out a disappointing breath.

"You were supposed to get off at the last transfer."

Adrenaline. Panic. "Are you kidding me," I thought. No Way. This kind of stuff doesn't happen to me.

Not to mention rushed. He was about to take off.

About 11 hours on the bus at this point and about 2 1/2 hours of sleep. I asked what can I do. He said he can't really help me. My options were to remain on the bus to the other side of the state, LANSING, or stay in Grayling, stranded. The thought of being on the bus and riding all over the state to completely miss my date of arrival made me want to cry, and the thought of hopping off the bus and not knowing what was going to happen made me want to cry. But I chose to stay in Grayling. I was already off course, and that would put me even further off if I stayed on. So I could barely speak, "I'm sorry," to the bus driver as I grabbed my bag and got off the bus because I was so choked up and a fountain of tears was about to bust loose.
The bus took off and there I was, 11:00 AM, drizzle, and my ticket for my last transfer. 
I started crying. Like really crying. Face all screwed up like a baby crying. I screamed out in my head a cry to God. Desperate for His help. I didn't know what was going to happen, but as soon as I turned my thoughts towards God and chose to trust Him in my desperate situation I knew it was going to be ok. I was still scared, very scared and frustrated, and mad at myself, and crushed, but I knew I was going to survive.

Next I called my dad. You see, he was going to pick me up in Reed City at 2:00PM that day which was about 2 hours South West of Grayling. Basically he was going to have to just come farther to get me and he was very caring and ready to rescue me. I called him right away because it was an emergency that I contact him asap, the only problem was that I was so choked up and sobbing, I couldn't really speak. You know those types of cries, that are basically uncontrollable. Those types of cries where you are at the mercy of the waves. Eventually I got my point out as passerby's offered help and demonstrated concern for this poor girl balling her eyes out.
After I could breath, I gathered my wits. My dad was going to get me at the Grayling McDonald's. I didn't know where that was, but I had a while to find it. So I spotted a gas station and walked to it in the now rain. With my bags. One nice thing about the rain was that people wouldn't be able to obviously tell that I was just crying, because everything else was wet too. The lady at the counter was very helpful telling me that the McDonald's was on this side of the street one, no, maybe two lights down. I thanked her and hurried out trying to hide my tears and fear and desperation. As I mentioned earlier, it was raining, and I was carrying my bags. And I was crying and all wet and I was lost. Praying in my head and mumbling to myself I decided to call my mom. I called her as I paced down the sidewalks in the rain. I updated her on the situation, and as I began to speak, of course the sobbing started again. Because when you are that choked up and you try to speak you end up crying. She went to work and started to help in any way she could. I got off the phone and kept walking. Wait... second light. No McDonald's. Well, I am just going to keep walking because it must be close. Another light, no McDonald's. The rain and tears continued and I decided to call my husband to let him know what was going on. The most he could do for me was pray and tell me it was going to be ok.  Sobbed through that phone call not trying to hide my panic as I was still walking and there was still no McDonald's. I was walking on the side of the highway now. Lots of traffic and only a mud path on the side of the road.
When I came around a curve, glowing before me was the wonderful McDonald's, I saw my safe haven. I walked in, expecting everyone to look at me like a fool for what I had just done. But, thankfully, I went unnoticed. After hours and hours about 20 minutes after I stepped off the bus and making contact with my dad, mom, and husband I sat and took a deep breath. Resting from my five or six light jaunt in the rain, with adrenaline, rain, tears, panic and a nap's worth of sleep. Then my phone rang, and it was my mom. Good news. Come to find out she was only an hour away from me, and she was on her way right now. She had already contacted my dad and things were righted. Things were going to be ok. And even though it was still raining just as before, it got brighter outside. Things were going to work out pretty decently.
How convenient that I happen to be at a McCaffe with deliciously warm hot cocoa. I made friends with a cup and thanked Jesus that I survived this life crisis. My mom came, I made it safely to where I was going and it was a beautiful wedding.

This really isn't a bad situation. It all worked out, nothing was lost or hurt. Everything was ok and way worse things could have happened. Stuff like this happens to people all the time. Just not me. And I have never been in a situation like this. My life is pretty simple and easy and I don't really have difficult situations to deal with other than my emotions that sometimes take me for a ride (like any other lady).

I can laugh now and share this story with ease, but this was a serious matter for me.
I learned and I owned the bus ride back. Let me tell you. I was all over every transfer. And the bus ride back was about 50 times better. I even got closer to 3 hours of sleep and things worked in my favor instead of against it.

THANK YOU, JESUS!

 The end.

Shout Out : Aunt Geri

 Now here is a lady that has been such a wonderful example in my life. My mother's only sister. 

I am so happy for my mom that she has a sister as wonderful as her. 

Being a big sister myself I can look to Aunt Geri's example of how to

 support, love, and ground my crazy little sister. 

{Angi, in a good way, you are my crazy lil' seester}

 Undoubtedly, Geri is full of compassion, love, and care for others. And undoubtedly Jesus' light shines through her. She glows with beauty and wisdom. Solid in her character yet still a teachable soul. 

(Not like I've ever had anything to teach my Aunt, 

but it's easy to tell because of her humble and gentle spirit.) 

 She is also, among many things, a wonderful example of a good wife. Her ability to agree to be under the protection of her husband is inspiring and there is much for me to learn in that respect. 

As a wife, hopefully I will never stop learning how to be better.

 One visit, on a lovely stroll, she shared with me some words of wisdom that I remember often. 

These words are precious to me. Words from a wife with wisdom from experience.

Kind of like when someone puts into words something you've been trying to express but never could. As if one sentence turned on the light and made sense of something you've been experiencing lately.

 Ya know what I mean?

 Geri, I admire and love you very much. 

It makes me heart happy to see all the wonderful blessings God has given you.

 I think you are fantastic and I hope you don't mind too much me bragging about you a little bit. 

Trust me, there's much more I could say, but I will keep it short and simple.

 Love you, Aunt Geri.

In the Matter of Drudgery

June 15th: GET A MOVE ON

"And beside this... add..." 2 Peter 1:5

In the Matter of Drudgery. You have inherited the Divine nature, says Peter (v.4), now screw your attention down and form habits, give diligence, concentrate. "Add" means all that character means. No man is born either naturally or supernaturally with character, he has to make character. Nor are we born with habits; we have to form habits on the basis of the new life God has put into us. We are not meant to be illuminated versions, but the common stuff of ordinary life exhibiting the marvel of the grace of God. Drudgery is the touchstone of character. The great hindrance in spiritual life is that we will look for big things to do.

 "Jesus took a towel...and began to wash the disciples' feet."

There are times when there is no illumination and no thrill, but just the daily round, the common task. Routine is God's way of saving us between times of inspiration. Do not expect God always to give you His thrilling minutes, but learn to live in the domain of drudgery by the power of God.
It is the "adding" that is difficult. We say we do not expect God to carry us to heaven on flowery beds of ease, and yet we act as if we did! The tiniest detail in which I obey has all the omnipotent power of the grace of God behind it. If I do my duty, not for duty's sake, but because I believe God is engineering my circumstances, then at the very point of my obedience the whole superb grace of God is mine through the Atonement. 

This is from the book 'My Utmost For His Highest' by Oswald Chambers. It is a compilation of some of his lectures given at a Bible Training College from the years 1911 to 1917.

I marvel at this kind of language. Sometimes I wish I was born centuries ago.
 But God put me here on purpose.
It is beautiful how God can speak to us through words written so long ago. It is beautiful how God never changes and what was true then is true now. It is beautiful that there is one Truth. Not a bunch of little truths based on perspective therefore meaning there are no truths.
Jesus is the Truth and the Way and the Life. He's the Only Way, and the only way worth going.

God is love and He loves you.  

Constant Communication

"Don't worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God."

Philippians 4:6

I've been called optimistic by many people. But I've always had a thing about preparing for the worst. That way I am never disappointed, right?

Well....

That mentality, from middle school, has encouraged my development of stress, anxiety, fear, and worry. Not to extreme levels by any means. But enough to keep me distracted. I am sure almost all of us have dealt with these at some point. That's okay, that's normal. It's just what we do with it......

Jesus came to save us and set us free. Even though this culture doesn't make room for the thought of living a stress free life, Jesus' culture is all about freedom. Anyone can have it too, even me. 

This is an excerpt from a devotional I read.

It helped me feel a relief and freedom from this whole stuck in stress mentality.

I look forward to the day where I realize the freedom in Jesus Christ that I have. 

& I'm learning little bits every day

"..the Scripture uses the extremes of "anything and "everything" to express how completely our lives should be bathed in prayer. The practice of communicating with God freely and continually throughout the day can encompass any issue of concern to you. We are invited by God to lay out our personal requests before Him..."

"Knowing that God is powerful and loving, a wise man and woman turn all their worries into prayers."